excerpts... plus extra added thoughts

i thought having blog [the generic] at blog [the specific] is better than having it at livejournal. it just sounds better and the URL, shorter most of the time. also, this blog's now open for everyone to read. unlike the old one which is heavily filled with unnecessary dramas caused by mostly uber shallow things and issues only in my mind exist. at least with this, i plan to showcase a different me. talk about desire for a sudden self-transformation.

anyway, work's starting to get us all stressed out. marketing in particular... we've started thinking of products to "make" a couple of weeks ago and until now, we're still hoping that either of the last two we submitted this afternoon would finally be accepted. didn't think it would be this hard to come up with a product/service. soriano's pretty strict with our proposals, which is both good and bad. the former because we know we're headed to something good and bad because we're slowly running out of time to work with whatever we have to work on.

a quick comment on each subject: [look at how disgusting this is, first entry and im talking about school.... anyway...]

finance is as expected interesting. but i think i'd like this better than accouting. this one's leaning more towards the practical side. and this thought just came up again, i wanna join finex. i really do. but the hell, if accounting grades were to be part of the qualifications, then woohoo, ill be sending out an early goodbye to the competition.

philo's getting me bobo. mundo ng ideya? o mundo ng nadarama? puta, why do we have to look at things exclusively from this or that point of view?! why can't it be a fusion of the two?

histo's boooring. and until now, im still bothered by the fact that our teacher smiles most of the time she discusses... it's as if there's something funny with the story. but wala e! freak. it's like at the back of her mind, nagagago ko na tong mga to. if smiling faces make our days better, hers doesn't. it does otherwise. haha. (that was pretty mean. anyway....)

opman? hamham.

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i should be off now. i told myself earlier that i should be in bed at 1030 or 11. but look at the clock now. it says 12.21. late for bedtime again. my taking a shower woke me up. i was sleepy the entire afternoon!

[jul22.04 entry. title: magkaibigang magkaaway] sa kaso ng magkaibang magkaaway, waring ikunukulong ng isa ang isa sa sariling sistema. nasa loob ng sistema ang mga konsepto at aksiyoma ukol sa kung ano ang nararapat. paano ba dapat kumilos ang isa? sa madaling sabi, sistema= aksiyoma= inaasahan. at hindi maikakaila na ang mga inaasahang ito ay maaaring magdulot ng maling pag-asa. sa huli, magagalit ka dahil hindi nasunod o naganap ang inaasahan mo. sasabihin mo sa sarili mo "putangina mo ka. wala kang kwenta." ni hindi mo namamalayan, ikaw ang gumawa ng sarili mong problema. sarili mong katangahan ang nagdulot ng iyong pagkabigo. o siguro, palibhasa, hindi lang talaga marunong makiayon yaong isang tao sa mga ninanais mo.

itigil mo na ang iyong maling pag-asa. sabi nga sa artikulo ni scott peck, kabiguan lamang ang susunod diyan. pabayaan mo na lang ang mga nangyayari. take it as it comes, 'ika nga.bahala na lang. basta sabihin mo na lang sa mga nanggagago sa yo, putang ina niyo! sarap pa ng pakiramdam mo!

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actually doesn't matter to me anymore. i think. i have pretty much built many of my newest beliefs/views through those experiences.1. you can' t have everything you want. 2. "kung ayaw mo, huwag mo." 3. it's stupid to expect from people. and you're stupid for expecting. 4. there are way more reasons to be happy than to be sad. 5. life is beautiful and it's bulls are not worth fretting over.

[aug15.04 entry. title: night before the accounting tests. perfect time to reflect.] i guess the best way to wrap this up is to list down the most recent realizations ive had.- that to live your life better, you have to learn from other people. whether learn things through their words, or learn them by experience. even if it means being hurt, frustrated or depressed.- that you can't always please other people. no matter how much you want to please them and make them realize how good you are as a person, that just won't happen. the more you try, the more frustrated you will become.- that you can't always get 100% trust of other people. they get to choose what to tell you or if they want tell you about things, in the first place. again, if you think you're trustworthy enough, they might not have the same thought. so bahala sila.- that your thoughts determine your emotions. and not the other way around. the more you think about the depressing things, the more you will be depressed. so to avoid that, it's better to just stop thinking about the things or people causing that bad mood. they're not significant enough to have the power to control you.- if you would lose your friends, you lose them. if you can avoid it, then do all the means you could to avoid that. but if they dont want you, then there's nothing you can do about it. they wanna get rid of you, e di go. maybe it just means they're not worth your time. stupid people.- no matter what your friends say, try to not mind them. they're just there to piss you or get you mad. but dont let that happen. just ride with what they're sayin. as long as it doesnt destroy you as a person. or your dignity. they're not worthy enough to get you angry or pissed or depressed or frustrated.


[Aug. 25. 04. Title: baha.] inakala kong makakauwi ako ng maaga kanina matapos ideklarang wala ng pasok. hindi ako natuwa na nawalan. dahil sayang sa damit at sayang sa oras. ang lakas pa naman ng ulan. nasayang lang ang tulog ko... sa kamalas-malasan nga naman, abutin daw ba ng tatlong uras mula ateneo hanggang sa bahay. para na akong naglakbay mula maynila patungong lucena. bobo diba? hindi ko maintindihan bakit ganito na ka-kadiri ang pilipinas. hindi sa iisang tao masisisi ang lahat ng kapalpakang ito. ang baha ay dahil sa kapalpakan at katangahan ng sangkaterbang tao. sa simula wala silang pakialam sa mga pinagagagawa nila. sa huli, tsaka sila mamimiligro sa naging epekto ng kanilang walang silbing kabobohan... habang nanonood ako ng tv ngayong gabi, nakinig ko na sinasabi ng ilang naapektuhan "sanay na kami dito"... at biglang naisip ko, "puta, hindi ba napakalungkot nun? na masabi mong sanay ka na sa baha?" bakit? kasi ibig sabihin nun, wala ng magandang pagbabagong nangyayari. puro kasiraan na... at malamang sa susunod, sa isang minutong pagbagsak ng malakas na ulan, asahan mong may swimming pool ka ng lalanguyan. at asahan mo ring, mauunahan ka pa ng balitang wala ng pasok sa pag-ihi mo. hindi pa bumabagsak sa inidoro ang huling patak ng mapalot mong ihi, bumuhos na ang ulan at baha na jan sa may kanto. at sasabihin na naman ng mga tao "Sanay na kami jan. buong buhay na namin ganyan ang nangyayari." at sasabihin ko, ang pathetic niyo. magpapabaya kayo para lang pahirapan ang sarili niyo. matino ba namang gawain iyon?